GoooooOd mOrning!! Thank you all for letting me be all miserable, angry, and depressing yesterday. (As if you had any choice in the matter ound: )
After several hours outside digging up dandelions that will only grow back in a few days' time, I feel a bit better. Better isn't really the right word but more accepting? I was listening to some podcasts and let my mind wander. I am coming to terms that nothing will be normal. That there is a very good possibility that neither of my kids will have a "normal" transition to whatever the next steps they take are. I am going to work on breaking down the expectations I have held. As I have said before, the "should be's" don't exist here. They might again and I sure hope that they do, but it is going to take a while. The bottom line is that I have to let go of the idea that Cait will be going back to school in Sept. She might go, she might do remote, she might go part-time if that is allowed and doesn't screw up her loans. Or she might take a gap year. All of those possibilities are fine- I told her that if she doesn't go back in Sept, that I will be disappointed but not with her, just at the situation. I think that telling her that will make her decision easier. Not that I have any say, but I know my opinions do mean a lot and I was unintentionally pushing her to go back.
She texted me last night while I was asleep to ask when we could drive around and listen to the Rent soundtrack. I had no plans today and now I do :rockon:
After dinner, we drank Pina Coladas and played a couple of rounds of Scattergories and man, we come up with some weird answers. Gary and Scott have the same crazy laugh and Caitlyn starts to wheeze when she laughs really hard. Makes me happy to hear those sounds.
Other than fighting with shoprite.com and hopefully out for a drive with Caitlyn, no plans.
Wishing everyone a wonderful day!
After several hours outside digging up dandelions that will only grow back in a few days' time, I feel a bit better. Better isn't really the right word but more accepting? I was listening to some podcasts and let my mind wander. I am coming to terms that nothing will be normal. That there is a very good possibility that neither of my kids will have a "normal" transition to whatever the next steps they take are. I am going to work on breaking down the expectations I have held. As I have said before, the "should be's" don't exist here. They might again and I sure hope that they do, but it is going to take a while. The bottom line is that I have to let go of the idea that Cait will be going back to school in Sept. She might go, she might do remote, she might go part-time if that is allowed and doesn't screw up her loans. Or she might take a gap year. All of those possibilities are fine- I told her that if she doesn't go back in Sept, that I will be disappointed but not with her, just at the situation. I think that telling her that will make her decision easier. Not that I have any say, but I know my opinions do mean a lot and I was unintentionally pushing her to go back.
She texted me last night while I was asleep to ask when we could drive around and listen to the Rent soundtrack. I had no plans today and now I do :rockon:
After dinner, we drank Pina Coladas and played a couple of rounds of Scattergories and man, we come up with some weird answers. Gary and Scott have the same crazy laugh and Caitlyn starts to wheeze when she laughs really hard. Makes me happy to hear those sounds.
Other than fighting with shoprite.com and hopefully out for a drive with Caitlyn, no plans.
Wishing everyone a wonderful day!