Hello ladies,
the Pope was on visit here. He made pray for peace, where was invited representatives of different religious (only Orthodox refused to join and exasperate us again, they really tried at the previous two days, but then on a final get back to their arrogance). All main politicians and even our king couple was there. But the basic was families with children. You can feel that the Pope is noble man even if you aren't religious.
We watched on TV, but dad offered to go, I say better no, because they warned that the space is limited and who came first will be allowed only until the seats are over, so I think is better to be used by really religious people for who this will have powerful meaning.
Previous weekend I had really hard time during Easter. Between coloring eggs and have fun with my family, there was many moral and philosophical questions which pop in. It's difficult to live without religion, sometimes I feel myself lost without something to rely on. I tried hard to found 'the lord' in my youth. Crossed from the walls of the cathedrals to the rings in the fields, and between, in search. But no. The old words are past, a myth, just a legends. The only real, sensible, constantly repeating power was my Old Friend the Death. As everything is born and exist according by her caprices. Everything happens with her blessing and as long as she allow. Who to be saved, who will gone, you can try so hard, with whole your heart, with the whole modern medicine and all prayers, but no, it's all in her hands. Did exist something bigger, something more powerful than her?! I never get an objective sign. Until finally I became agnostic and I'm stuck there, feeling this life as constantly pain. It's like an old trauma, which you still feels if pressured it too hard and sometimes when weather change. It's especially difficult on holidays. This heavy load of self blaming and regrets, on your shoulder, to heavy to hold, too weak to stand it. My failing is that I'm too susceptible to side monition. Before years I read one quote, I never could to find it after that but I believed in it immediately, because I felt whit my heart that it must be true! It was said something as: "If you see adversity and do not correct it, you are response for it as much as the person who did it!". But the harder you try to help, more adversity and suffering you found around... until you become heartless. It must be so relief, to can just to kneel, say a prayer, make a confession and someone will forgive your sins. It was tempted as a possibility, more than the Karma and it's personal responsibility, but wait, christians have many bad traps as only one live, and plenty of rules and restrictions which may never allows you to see your beloved again. For example if you have two childs and lost one early, till the other take some bad decisions. And if one is up and other down you will be able to be only whit one of them and this is no exit road. And here come the Agnosticism also, how could we be sure that there is Haven, Summerland, or next incarnation ?! Maybe we are just a toy of some impassive creator and what is taken from us never come back?! I think you get the picture! So I was suffering in this crisis few days. Watching more and more reports for the destructive human nature, hypocrites and heartless. Burn in doubts, lost in sorrow.
And then BAM!!! ; just to show that ''Life is bigger than us!'' and somewhere something just have fun with us; there exactly where I was, on a page which I could read in any other time, in book I have from more than year but wasn't read till now; everything finished at the same way as it start -- with another quote totally opposite to previous! On page 133 one girl explaining how happiness is to live concentrated only in what surround you, and how you can't really change anything else except yourself. Early in my life this egoistic philosophy would disgust me, but in this point of my life it sounds so natural, so right. So I just put down my load, and lied down near to it, allows time and nature to make from this rock whatever they want, I can't handle it anymore.
And that's it how my Summer start with promise to be reckless and carefree! It's not looks much possible, but let see where this path will took me to.
For now let see what's been happening in your world.
Chris, congrats for Scott's scholarship! Fingers crossed everything with Gary's appt and the stomach problems to not be too serious! Oh, if you are forewarn the lady with little dog and she still don't care, she is such a b***. Actually bat in LR year round sounds as a fun. Or as a huge Batman fans
! I hope everything on your busy week to happen easy and to not stressed you too much!
Kay, you described such a lovely family time, I'm so happy for you! Hope your daughter will feeling better soon! This Birthday/Thanksgiving party sound so exciting, but aren't you worried to travel nine hour trip in winter weather?! Don't you have snow storms and wet roads? Or this is still desert area?
Nancy, I'm sorry, this is rude, but I'm laughing so hard on your car moving story that there is tears in my eyes! Sounds so familiar. Why men get angry so quick?! Yeah, the house cleaning sounds satisfy! But how scary about your fell! I'm glad that you are fine!
Trudy, Great that the spare omelet place is not disappointed you! The music will be on and bottling wine sounds as weekend for which many could be dreamed about! I like Avengers too! But I'm afraid I messed the row in which I watched them and Thor and Iron men. Why they don't put numbers on these series, but different titles?! It's confusing to follow what happens one after other.
How sad about the car accident!
Rae, you knows that you have our finger crossed for best decision for B to happen soon! I bet with the improving of the weather you enjoy your offline time even more!
Jean, the rhododendron inspired drawing is very pretty! I like these dark colors! I'm a hoarder too! Hard for me to deal with my 'mental cleaning', but there are bunch of old stuff under my bed in ''sentimental boxes'', that have to be revised. I don't do it fast as I was hope. Good luck with your research!
Karen, I hope that Joey dig before the bath! I think I'm never seen dog wash, is that something like pet grooming salon?! You have so many modern places, I found myself old fashioned :icon_frown: !
