I am really stressing today. I had a rough day yesterday, more F-ups with the Lyme meds/pharmacy/insurance stuff. Then I called my breast surgeon to let her know that I would be starting the new abx by the end of this week (hopefully). When the nurse called back, she was concerned b/c the surgeon doesn't like to do surgeries if there is an active infection. So now they want to call my Lyme dr to figure out what to do. On top of that, weather forecasts are calling for snow/ice on Monday. Last night I even had a dream that I got my pathology back and that it had spread and they were immediately hooking me up to chemo.
I can't deal with much more. I feel like as soon as I get a little bit stable, it all changes again.
Right now, my biggest fear is that the surgery won't happen. I won't be able to handle that. At all. I know that it is unlikely-- myrational brain says that. But my irrational, fear-driven, insane part is getting stronger with each freaking bump i am hitting.
On the good news side, Cait and I have an appt to get our nails done together on Friday. And as long as it stops snowing in time (only AM snow showers are being predicted for today) I am meeting my bff for coffee. Gotta keep finding the good.
I am so so sorry for being such a downer. I have said it a million times that I don't handle change well and that is what every hour seems to do to my life ATM.
Anyway, I will shut up now..... if I am really quiet, it is nothing personal!
love to all!
I can't deal with much more. I feel like as soon as I get a little bit stable, it all changes again.
Right now, my biggest fear is that the surgery won't happen. I won't be able to handle that. At all. I know that it is unlikely-- myrational brain says that. But my irrational, fear-driven, insane part is getting stronger with each freaking bump i am hitting.
On the good news side, Cait and I have an appt to get our nails done together on Friday. And as long as it stops snowing in time (only AM snow showers are being predicted for today) I am meeting my bff for coffee. Gotta keep finding the good.
I am so so sorry for being such a downer. I have said it a million times that I don't handle change well and that is what every hour seems to do to my life ATM.
Anyway, I will shut up now..... if I am really quiet, it is nothing personal!
love to all!