Journaling:
Friday at last. I had a great, relaxing morning. I played around in photoshop and even managed to get a couple of layouts done uninterrupted.
In the afternoon I helped Lexi work on another digital layout. I am so happy to be teaching her how to scrap digitally.
But the fun ended when I got a call from the Citadel. Apparently my mom had been sitting by the front door since 9am this morning waiting to get picked up. It was now 1:30pm. That was not like her so I quickly went up to check on her. When I arrived, there she was, waiting by the door and of course when she saw me her face lit up like a child's.
I knelt down in front of her and gently asked her what she was doing. She said she was coming over to my place. I asked her how she was going to get there and she said she was going to call a taxi (she doesn't know how to call one, thank goodness). I asked her if she knew my address and she said no. I looked into her beautiful eyes and just waited. A few seconds later I saw that she was "back". She realized she didn't know what she was doing. I said let's go upstairs and have a rest.
I took her back to her room and she sat back in her big chair. She was normal again, I could tell. I left her for a while and came back later, by then she was joking about trying to escape the care centre. It made me sad though, that she was 'gone' from reality for such a long time. That's the first time this has happened since her trauma nearly three years ago, but it is normal with the progression of dementia. The rest of the day I kept seeing her eyes in my mind, cloudy with uncertainty. I thought about how much I will miss seeing her eyes when she is gone from me. And so I worry that she will slip from me more and more and maybe one day I wont be able to bring her back. Dont go Mom.

Anna Aspnes
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