This one was a tough one for me. A lot harder than I thought it would be.
Journaling reads:
My perfect day is something I find incredibly difficult to write about. The thoughts, dreams, joy and love that it would encompass bring out old, buried emotions of sadness, heartache, worry and many more emotions I couldnt even begin to express.
How can the thought of a perfect day do this to someone? Because, you see, I have five wonderful, sweet, amazing children who I love more than I could ever express, but my children are all Autistic. Their diagnosis encompasses multiple variations of Aspergers Syndrome, High Functioning Autism, ADHD, Shuddering attacks and moderate/severe Autism.
A truly perfect day, where everything was how it can only be in a dream, would be one where my children did not suffer from their struggles. While I do not wish for their Autism to be taken away - because to me, to remove the Autism, would be to change who my children are, but a day where the Autism did not cause daily heartache,
pain and suffering for them. Where they could be happy at school and not come home despondent from bullying and abuse from other kids.
One where my youngest son is able to interact with others without high pitched screeching, screaming, hitting, kicking and meltdowns.
Where my 9yo daughters shuddering attacks did not prevent her from functioning in a normal manner, and her violent meltdowns at school that have caused her to have to be regularly held down & restrained did not happen.
A day for my 12yo son to receive the assistance he needs at school to understand what peoples body language means. Where he would no longer feel lost and confused by the Teachers directions and where he would not have a
driving need to spin, twirl, bounce, and generally act in a way that is seen as a nuisance in so many ways.
Where my 10yo daughter does not have an incontrollable impulse for being in peoples faces. For demanding every speck of attention from everyone, every second of every day. Where she does not shut out help, love and direction that is given to try to aid her in learning how to function
in society. Where she doesnt cause endless fights & arguments due to her inability to understand that her actions are hurtful & upsetting to others.
I would give the world... for a day where my 14yo daughter felt safe at school. When she was not harassed, put down and bullied every minute of every day by sneaky, nasty children who have nothing better to do with their time. A day where she would not wish she could go home (heaven) because life for her, is simply too painful and confusing.
A day where I could bask in the joy of my childrens differences, uniqueness and amazing personalities, without the struggles. That for me would truly be perfect.
CREDITS:
Kit is "Along With You" by Joe Designs.
